I will never ever forgive you…


image courtesy – picstopin.com

This day last year, changed the course of my life..

Let’s not get into who was right and who was wrong.. or what was right and what was wrong..
The only thing that matters is this very day we ceased to be what we were..

May be you didn’t like the decision that I took.. May be you found it wrong.. May be you thought it wasn’t right of me to do such a thing.. But, instead of taking that drastic step, you could have thought just once as to why I did so.. You could have reasoned once and tried to think in another perspective.. Heck, if not anything, you could have directly confronted me instead of just……
No, I don’t blame you.. In your place, may be I’d have done the same thing.. But, may be, I wouldn’t have. May be I’d have been a little considerate and tried to put myself in your shoes before taking any decisions recklessly that would have adverse affects like the one you took..

I make no bones to hide the fact that, instead of being a man, I cry.. I have cried so many times in my life.. But always on my fate, never for a person.. None whomsoever. But you were different. You were the first person for whom I cried. And have been crying ever since that awful day..

Leaving all other matters aside, the ultimate thing is that, one decision that I took has made me far from you forever and ever.
Even if you found it wrong, couldn’t you’ve just chose to forgive me instead of choosing to leave and punish me? Couldn’t you’ve chosen to stay back for all the rights I had done and chose to let-go of this one wrong? Couldn’t you’ve held my hand, just like all the old times, even when I didn’t do anything to cheer you up, saying ‘your presence is more than enough…’ Couldn’t you?

How could you forget all the meals I had skipped to be with you? How did you forget all those times I forego my sleep to spend some time with you? How did you forget the number of times I accompanied you on your shopping sprees? Didn’t you ever remember how I let go of my choices, to accommodate yours in every walk of my life, be it movies, food, hotels, eateries, clothes, time, place, accessories? Didn’t you ever remember the number of times you told me I complete your life? That I bring happiness whenever I come to meet you? Weren’t you madly in love with me until you were ignorant of my doing?
Why did you not see that there was an entire possibility of you never knowing it, unless I confessed, what with you living in a different town? Why did you not see that I could have totally let it be and never tell you and you’d not be any the wiser? Why did you not see that I could have hidden it but I chose to let you know?

How could you not think of me , even once, before taking such a step? How could you even let go of me, the one you madly loved? How could you choose as harsh as death as a punishment?
Yeah, you killed a part of me the moment you decided to go ahead with your tragic and psychotic decision! You cut me from your life in a moment and left me to live rest of my time in your memories, dying a slow death every single day!

I know I can never get you in my life.. I know that you’ve gone way too far that there is no way that you’ll come back.. I know pretty well that I should move on and get along with my life, but.. I know that I will never stop loving you, no matter what.. I know that I can never get you out of my mind.. And I know that I can never hate you even when you were so inconsiderate towards me and threw me out of your life and I can never hate you even when you went too far away leaving me behind all alone..

I will never forgive you for what you’ve done.. I will never forgive you for asking me to leave from your life.. I will never forgive you for going so far away from me that I can never reach you..
I will never ever forgive you..

P.S  :

Friend 1 – “What happened?”

Friend 2 – “The girl who lives next door found him on his terrace in a pool of blood, vomit and booze. She was the one who brought him here. Doctors are treating him.”

F1 – “Man, it’s been about a year now and he hasn’t still got over her?”

F2 – “Apparently not.. Today…today is her anniversary… That’s why the overdose!”

F1 – “Shit!”

F2 – “Yeah.. She committed suicide on this very day last year..”

F1 – “And made our Romeo a living corpse, a loner…! Man, I don’t even remember when did I see him smiling last..”

F2 – “Probably this very day last year when he was going to meet her to tell her..”

F1 – “Shit, they were so perfect together.. I thought they would end up marrying each other..”

F2 – “Everybody thought so too.. But, destiny probably had other plans…”

About Jigar Doshi

M.B.A. Blogger. Love to watch movies and read fiction. Occasionally, dabble with writing some fiction too. Spend most of leisure time on Twitter and Quora.
This entry was posted in destiny, feelings, hurt, life, love, relationships, sad, tragedy. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to I will never ever forgive you…

  1. Pingback: Just leave me alone! - Jigar Doshi

  2. bettyl says:

    Wow. That certainly pulls many emotions to the surface.

  3. Annie says:

    “couldn’t you’ve just chose to forgive me instead of choosing to leave and punish me? Couldn’t you’ve chosen to stay back for all the rights I had done and chose to let-go of this one wrong?”……………amazing words……….

  4. Mihir j Sheth says:

    Very touchy ! Did yew write it ?

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